My Lenten Journey Update
The purpose of Lent is to grow closer to God and to make sacrifices that increase your faith. Within a couple of weeks I realized the one cup of coffee was a bad idea. It wasn't meshing with me yelling less. I was irritable, which equates to short tempered. Was this bringing me closer to God?
Ironically at the same time I was pondering this a host on Catholic radio brought up the same topic. Lenten sacrifices should bring you closer to God and be reevaluated along your journey. Being miserable every day of Lent, pulling away from God, and perhaps annoying friends and family as you stick to your promise fails. You want them to see the light of God in you not see a miserable Catholic. In fact, on fasting days you should appear refreshed and strong just like you do every other day.
So I welcomed back coffee but still drink less. It centers me and my afternoon cup was always enjoyed after school/work as I talked to darling daughter about our days. Me being grouchy wasn't good for us. We even discussed it and she agreed, drink the coffee Mommy!
But I didn't just want to add it back in without doing anything. I needed to do something. So I opted to really focus on devoting more time in prayer and at the time I didn't see this as giving something up but adding something in but as I type this I realize I did have to give something up to do more of something else. Less computer time, less lazy time, and with running to the rosary, less music time or drifting mind time. More focus on God, less focus on me and my wants.
In hindsight, this is perfect! This is how it should be. Why didn't I think of this before? But ultimately that is part of Lent. Growing in faith. Finding a better you more connected to God. And for me, it was a learning time and a hard learning lesson that I still thought too much about me and desired words of affirmation way too much. I should do things just because and even though a thanks is nice, not getting one shouldn't annoy me. In all reality, who I should be concerned about pleasing is God.
How am I doing on the yelling? Argh...I had to reach out for prayers to help ease my overwhelmed mind and not let messes in the house or a sassy girl get the best of me. Oh that sass! Lord, please help me! And He is. I am praying more on that that too.
And prayer makes a difference. My house is getting well, more peaceful. Dear hubby and I are back to our date nights and focusing time of each other. I am letting some of the messes go and just enjoying the moment. I am cuddling more and trying to structure my errand/chore time better so I can be there for my family in a happier way. At work, I am centering on God and not getting overwhelmed by the 300+ emails and orders to be entered. I am taking each order one at a time and going forward with faith. And I have been blessed with one work at home day a week so my at work days have a defined purpose and my work at home day has a defined purpose and guess what? It is leaving me more focused and efficient.
Daily Gratitude: I am thankful I can work a day a week from home.
Daily Bible Verse: Listen to advice and accept discipline, and at the end you will be counted among the wise. ~ Proverbs 19:20